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A Friendship That Crossed Borders

Some friendships are loud and obvious. Others are quiet, rare, and so genuine that you only realize their value when life tests you. This is about one of those rare friendships. She came all the way from Indonesia to Singapore just to see me and that alone says more than a thousand words ever could. In a world where people are always busy, always rushing, always distracted, finding someone who makes time for you feels almost unreal. Genuine friendship is hard to find. The kind that lasts forever is even harder. Most people don’t have time to listen. They hear you, but they don’t listen. But she listens, always. With patience. With care. Without judgment. Most people don’t want to help. They step back when things get hard. But she steps forward every single time. Helping not because she has to, but because she genuinely wants to. She is one of the kindest people I know. I once said that I have a wall around my life, a wall that protects me and keeps people at a distance. Not many can...
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How Far Would You Go For Love?

How far would you go for love?

When you’re in love, there are no boundaries, no reservations, and it is unconditional that you’ll do anything for the sake of it. But this is not always the case.

These are few questions that you can ponder to know how far you are willing to go for the person you love:
  1. Are you willing to convert your religion for your partner?
  2. Can you give up your career?
  3. Are you okay with long distance relationship?
  4. Can you forgive infidelity?
  5. Are you willing to marry your partner?
It is easy to say that you can do all of these. But actions speak louder than words. And the reality is, we are not perfect, we must accept the truth that sometimes it is impossible to do it all the way. Frankly, not all of us can do all the sacrifices for our love. But there are people who are fighting and willing to sacrifice everything for their partner. I envy them. Though all our opinions are different, they still have to be valued.

Some can’t sacrifice their religion while others are willing to convert. Imagine how difficult the situation to those people. You would say, why would they not guard their hearts to fall in love from the beginning if they already knew what will be the outcome. But can anyone really dictate our hearts who it chooses? Maybe cupid got it wrong, anyway. I envy those people who are willing to convert their religion to be married to their partner. I could not imagine how difficult their position is, that they can be disowned by their parents, families and friends because of the path they will choose for a lifetime. I respect them for fighting for their love and I could say it’s never a mistake but truly a destiny.

Have you been in a situation where you need to follow your partner to live with him in a place outside your comfort zone? You know that one way or another that someone needs to give in for the relationship to work out. Personally, changes don’t bother me, and I am willing to accept it. Though this decision will impact everything especially if you’ve come a long way with your career, already established friendships and you’ve got your family here but come to think of it, you can find a new career in that place, but one thing for sure is that you’ll have your own family with your partner and you can broaden your friends in the new place you will move in.

Can you give up your career for love? It’s a very big decision to make especially to all career-oriented people. In this regard, we’re already talking about the future for the both of you. Even me, I can never think of giving up my career but if it’s necessary, I will do it as long as my partner can able to sustain our needs. Love is an amazing feeling but it’s not always the practical way. Both parties should understand it and both opinions should matter.

What if one day, you need to be separated a thousand miles away with your partner because of whatever reason, will you still continue the relationship with him? Not everyone is okay with a long distance relationship. Everyone has its own opinion about it. Honestly, I’m okay with it. I’ve been in a long distance relationship, and I survived it, “we” both survive it. I can say that it’s true about the saying “No pain, no gain”. I’ve been sad with that set up for a long time, but I knew it was only temporary. Let’s just say it was a challenge and if both of you pass, then time will come that you can never be separated again and will be bonded stronger. And if time comes again that one needs to be far away, it will not be problem anymore because both you had learned the lessons and nothing or I could say no one could break your love with each other.

What if it’s about infidelity, could you still forgive and go for love? Infidelity happens everywhere. I’m not saying I’m accepting it, it’s just that what can you do if it already happened. I’m not condemning people that stay in this situation. I respect and understand them because I know they have their own reasons. All I’m saying is that for me, I can’t put back shattered pieces of myself over and over again every time I’ll be broken. So, for me whether to stay or not depends with the situation. I can forgive you a single time, but if it’s more than that, that for me is the time to let go because what’s the point of staying and fighting for love if it’s not worthy. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me, right?

Can you marry your partner? Not all are okay to give up their bachelor life too soon or some don’t even want to give it up ever. It’s really a difficult decision in your life. I always recall what my mother always told me when I was young, “Marriage is not like hot rice that you spit out once you get burned”. It’s a lifetime commitment that needs caring, love, understanding, respect and faith. It could be easy or messed up. Nobody knows what will happen. Coming from a married woman, getting married is easy, staying happily married is the difficult part. I am blessed that I have a great husband that makes it easy staying happily married day in and day out.
  
What about you, how far would you go for love?
love, go for love, all the way

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